Some of my favourite entries from the Moms calendar

July 17/18: Simply having children does not make mothers. --Irish proverb

June 30: Why do moms ask questions that have such obvious answers? For example:
Do you want a spanking?
Do you want to go right to bed?
Don't you want to save some of that cake for your brother?
Do you want a piece of advice?
July 20: Mom's Definition Intuition: Your ability to know what your child's excuse is going to be before he knows what it's going to be.

August 17: Mom's Definition Middle Age: The time after your mother took care of you and before your children take care of you.

August 10: Moms are like computers because only their creator understands their internal logic.

June 21: A Mommy Moment One afternoon Helen realized it had been several minutes since she heard the voices of her two little sons, Tom and Scott, playing in the yard. Silence usually meant they were up to no good, so she went outside to investigate. Her older son Tom, age six, was standing by the side of the house wearing a guilty look. His four-year-old brother Scott was playing alone in the sandbox. "What does this say?"Helen demanded as she pointed to the letters "T-O-M" carved in the siding of the house. Tom answered, "It says 'Scott.' He must have carved it."

June 18: Remember when you were twenty-five and you thought perhaps Mom might know a few things about putting a household together? Funny how she had gained all that knowledge while you were away at college.

July 29: You know you're a real mom when... You ask your girlfriends if anyone has to go potty before entering the movie theater on Girls' Night Out.